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Archive for the ‘Big Game’ Category

Apple Turkey, turkey!

Thu ,19/11/2009

Thanksgiving will soon be upon us again. Are you bored with same old turkey and stuffing? You are? What’s wrong with you? Turkey is as American as Mom and Apple pie. I’ll bet you didn’t know that Benjamin Franklin once lobbied for the turkey to be the national bird. That’s right, old Ben wasn’t even thinking Bald Eagle. Of course, he also lobbied for German to be our language, instead of English. What a strange and wonderful character!

So, this Thanksgiving you’re willing to try making the bird. It’s not as difficult as Aunt Josephine would have you believe. In fact, She spends all of about 20 minutes prepping, and then knocks back half a bottle of Boone’s Farm, while everyone else comments on how much work she’s doing.

MFO: 6 There’s a fair amount of prep work to be done, and some of it ain’t pretty! We’ll talk giblets a little later.

Elephant Stew

Wed ,18/11/2009

I got this recipe from a little old lady in the local grocery. She saw I was having trouble deciding between red beans or garbanzo beans and just offered up this help: “You should do Elephant stew! I tried it in Botswana, back in the early 90′s. There was a shortage of cottage cheese in the country, so the villagers had to make do with what they had. We all came to find out that hunting elephants with a truck goes considerably bad for the truck, while the elephants were left curiously unhurt.” – I backed up slowly and when I was at a safe distance, turned and ran from the store, dropping all I had in my hands before I got to the exit. When I got to the car, guess who was standing there…She finished her story like this…

MFO: 10 Dear God, send in the Marines! Save me from the little old ladies!