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Barely Legal Brown Sugar Bacon

Dude, this one screams outlandish. This stuff is like seeing your ex- girlfriend at the state fair with some drunken hillbilly, who’s missing all his teeth and drooling. It doesn’t even matter if he’s drooling because he drank too many Milwaukee’s Bests. All that matters is that that lying, self-absorbed, good-for-nothin’ hussy looks foolish babysitting a grown man. Karma is awesome!

MFO: 1? Maybe. Unless you have the hand-eye coordination of a blind, double amputee, there should only be a broiler pan to clean.

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